[Georgy Drachenköter]

The Deadly Star.
FANS SPECULATE A SICK MUSE FRONTMAN. OR DISGUSTED?


Muse frontman, Matthew Bellamy at V Festival, Staffordshire.

A photo in renowned Muse gallery, microcuts.net, surfaced recently depicting Muse frontman pinching his nose. Fans have been sent into a frenzy, wondering why anyone would capture such a moment. The fact that the fans are apparently psychotic according to Bellamy could be the reason why they are going spack.

"He was sneezing!" say the logical people at fan forum, The Artist's Muse, "Fuck's sake."

"I think he wants to quit the band. Chris must stink, and Dom after hitting those drums and stuff," speculate people at the Muse board. Some members have also been adding that perhaps it was Dom's aftershave stinking out the stage, "Or Matt's. Possibly his. Then again, that Tom [Kirk, Muse media manager] is a bit of a bastard."

Witness reports from the show conduct that perhaps he was trying to commit suicide, as holding your nose whilst sneezing is a well-known attempt in blowing your brains out. Conspiracy theorists agree.
"Oh, he's off his rocker indeed. See his facial expression? He's trying extremely hard to blow his brains out," leading expert in body language and conspiracy of human behaviour Dr. Phillip Gregory says, "It's common fact."

"He looks pissed off. Maybe because we won't shut up about it," adds The Artist's Muse.

"HE CAN TASTE BANANAS AND IS ANGRY HE HASN'T HAD ONE LATELY!!1!!11!1!1one!1!1" speculate the frontman's Muse board thread, the PMT, full of sociopaths.

In an interview with Bellamy recently he dismisses all rumours and gives "brownie points" to The Artist's Muse for not being absolute twats over the photo.

Story by: Goya Olecki




Okay, wahrscheinlich kann hier kaum jemand was mit den Anspielungen anfangen…